The Daniel Family Adoption Blog

A little girl was born in the Fuling District of Chongqing, China around February 10, 2006. Her parents loved her very much, and cared for her as best they could. Unfortunately, this little girl was born with a heart condition known as tetralogy of Fallot, characterized by cyanosis, lethargy, and irritability. By the time the little girl turned one year old, her parents decided that they had to get help for their precious little baby. On February 10, 2007, their hearts were broken so that their daughter’s heart could be made whole. They left
their daughter at the gate of the Chongqing City Fuling District Social Welfare Institute–the local orphanage.
The little girl was taken in by the orphanage staff and because she was so happy and graceful, that became her name: Le Man. Her heart condition was diagnosed, and Love Without Boundaries, a humanitarian agency, paid to have little ManMan’s heart repaired. ManMan was admitted to the hospital on March 15th and underwent corrective surgery on March 27th. She spent a total of 46 days in the hospital.

Our hearts were stolen by a little girl from China named Wu Hong Ping back in September of 2005. When we gazed upon her little cherubic face we said, “What a delicate little Plum Blossom.” We had two strong-willed boys, and we were confident that this little girl, who would later become RED, would be quiet and compliant–every parents dream. However, the old adage, “looks can be deceiving” soon took on a whole new meaning for us. RED’s first several months as an American and as a Daniel were plagued by refusal to eat, sleepless nights, tantrums, and withdrawal. Despite all of these problems and our own feelings of inadequacy inflamed by the occasional, “Boy, you’ve got your hands full,” we knew that we were supposed to adopt again. We have come to realize that we are inadequate to raise one child without the help of the Lord, and although our hands were full, there was still plenty of room in our hearts for another child.

We officially began the process of adopting another one of China’s girls on May 9, 2006. Along with our Application to Adopt, we filled out a Medical Needs Checklist, a form that allowed us to indicate our
willingness to review the file of a child with a given medical diagnosis. Representatives from our adoption agency (CCAI) told us that it was unlikely that we would be matched with a special needs child because we cautiously indicated very few conditions that we would consider. At the time, we believed that this was God’s will for us, and we continued to pursue our daughter through the healthy child pathway. Our dossier was completed and mailed to CCAI on November 13, 2006 (RED’s birthday), logged into the China Center of Adoption Affairs (CCAA) on December 19, 2006 (Joshua’s Birthday), and the long wait began.

We continued to feel in our hearts that God wanted us to adopt a child with special needs. This feeling was intensified by the wait time doubling from twelve months to nearly twenty-four months. We updated our checklist to include many additional medical conditions on July 17, 2007. Line by line we went through the list, researching the conditions, and then indicating what conditions we would consider.  These were some of the hardest decisions of our lives; it felt as though we were forced to choose one child over another, and that by not simply checking “yes” to all of the conditions we were not relying on God. We eventually came to realize that no matter what we did, God was in absolute control, and He had been preparing us for this for a
long time. Most of the needs that we checked “yes” were those that required medical, surgical, and/or pharmacologic intervention, which we felt that we had been trained or equipped to manage. One of the
conditions that we expressed a willingness to consider was a heart condition known as tetralogy of Fallot.
We were expecting the wait time to be as long as thirteen months when we submitted our updated Medical Needs Checklist. What CCAI told us took us by surprise: “You are at the top of our list of families to be matched.” Our place in line had been reserved by our initial checklist filed along with our initial paperwork. After all the waiting, and prayers for the process to shorten, we had to tell CCAI to wait to match us until the middle October, which would allow us to accumulate enough vacation time.  In the interim, our hearts continued to ache to be united with the little girl who was meant to be ours, and on October 2, when we
could take it no longer, we decided to call CCAI and tell them that we were ready to be matched. Robin called CCAI early October 3; CCAI called back later that afternoon…

CCAI called Robin’s cell phone as she was on her way into the gym: no paper, no pencil, no reason to believe that we would be matched with our daughter for several days or even weeks. The representative forwarded us a ton of information on Fu Le Man, “more information than we’ve ever seen on a waiting child.” We had all the pictures which are now posted on our Yahoo group, assessments, physician opinions, progress reports, and even an echocardiogram.  They told us that we would have been paired with little ManMan sooner, but we had requested not to be matched. They thought that she matched our criteria indicated on the Medical Needs Checklist perfectly.  After a day of prayerful consideration, and more research into her heart condition, we filled out the paperwork to confirm that she was ours. 

We were united with our daugher, RKD, on January 6, 2008, in the Fuling Social Welfare Institute.  Our excitement on that day was, as you can well imagine, palpable.  No words can come close to describing the anxiety and the excitement and even the fear that adoptive parents experience when they are about to meet their child for the first time.  Likewise, words are completely incapable of expressing the absolute terror that a child, who is too young to understand what is going on, is placed into the arms of strangers who look, smell and talk funny.  Our little butterfly, RKD, had no trouble expressing herself; as we stood in the open-air courtyard of the orphanage, she let all of the residents within a sixteen block radius know that she was not pleased with the situation.  We became the entertainment for the community.

Within days RKD began to settle in with us, and show us more of that wonderful, charming smile of hers.  As we met her needs, responded to her fears, pulled her close, and whispered how much we loved her, we could almost hear her heart softening to let us in.  It takes a lot of strength and courage to dare to love again after your heart has been broken.

Today, nearly a year later, RKD is a delightful, happy, and content little girl.  She loves her toys, her dolls, her brothers, and her sister.  She mets the hearts of her parents when she tears away from the dolls and the playing to say, “I love you, Mama,” and “I love you, Daddy.” 

“Thank you, RKD, for your heart!”  –Daddy